A Better Life For You
www.uklifecoaching.org

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Happy Monday? (Ugh?)

If you spent any of your weekend dreading today, then maybe you'll appreciate this little oasis of joy.

Check out Eric on the right. Look at the grin. Eric is in his office. I don't think he dreaded coming to work. He's grinning because he just did something magical with his hands and the audience went wild. Adoration isn't a bad thing at work, right?

He wrote the piece he's playing. And he invented the way he's playing his guitar. So autonomy and creativity are in his job spec.



Eric Mongrain playing Air Tap!

Having a boss who's a really nice fellow (himself) isn't all bad either. You get the point: Eric loves his job - and maybe you can see what's coming next - an invitation to look at your own job.

When work is a misery it hits you in several ways. It's not just the moment-by-moment misery of being there, it's the stress you bring home to pollute the rest of your life, and the destruction of your restful sleep, and the crushing of your spirit and your dreams.

It's the devil you know, of course, and you'd be in deep doo doo if you lost it, so many folks will feel they can't even think about changing things. They may even believe they're in the job they deserve - carrying fear of not being able to cope, or being "exposed for the charlatan they really are" in another job. That's a trap, of course, all driven by fear trying to protect your ego from potential harm.

The truth is, you can make changes happen - both small and large. You can modify your boss's behaviour, you can increase your pay, you can change your role or get an entirely new one - but not by doing what you're doing right now.

The question is, will you risk £10 and 20 minutes in talking to me about how? Either way, click the image and enjoy Air Tap! - you'll love it.

>> Make Your Start Here

PS: This arrived last week from a client I work with from time to time who I've grown to like a lot:

Hi Chris

I hope you are well.

Just got out of a meeting with my boss.
I’ve been promoted to Lead Engineer.
This is great news for me and I felt you would enjoy sharing my success.

Many Thanks

Wonderful stuff!

Outrageous Fortune?

Here's a little exercise in mistaken certainties, for you.

I often talk about them - the things you don't just suspect are true - you know they are.

Often, they are totally wrong, but - because we act as though they were true, we avoid checking them (why would we - we know, right?) And so the mistaken certainty remains unchallenged.

These mistaken certainties are the bricks we build our prisons with. They may tell us we have to stay in a miserable marriage or job, for example, because we're not going to get another one, or a whole bunch of other untruths spanning all of human existence.

People tend to assume I'm wealthy. Full-price coaching is £60 and you don't need many of those a week to keep you in champaign, right? Well - more than half the coaching business I do is marketing, for which the pay is zero, so there's that. Furthermore, quite a few of the clients I work with receive discounts of various kinds, like the hardship scheme.

Then, you will not know that I have also chosen to work as a personal tutor, working with children who are struggling to keep up at school. It complements my coaching - it's still about helping people to repair the damage and reach their potential. It's not well paid.

When the dust settles, I do OK financially; I drive an old car, and live in a ... challenging area, but that's OK, wealth is not my personal priorty. In my corporate career, when I earned a great deal of money, I learned for sure that money really doesn't buy you happiness. And I have confirmed it several times over in my coaching of hitherto-unhappy millionaires. (They pay the same rate!).

If you find my free newsletters and other resources helpful, there is now an opportunity for you to say thank you with a small donation.

A Glimpse at my Case File

Below, you'll find some correspondence (suitably annonymised) with clients on matters which may help you, too. Subscribers to my Facebook Page will have seen these some time ago. You're welcome to join me.

Big Spender with a Small Purse?

Hi J,

I see this is a long-standing goal, and one which duplicates an earlier goal, so you've struggled for quite a while on this one. Here are some thoughts for you.

Persistent problems come down to habit, and they are difficult to remove. But not impossible.

My ideas for you are these:


1. Find a talisman to remind you that things are going to be different

2. Get to the root of EXACTLY what it is that you do or don't do - which is perpetuating your financial problems. If it's spending on things you don't need, for example, then find out exactly what things it is.

>> Read the other five ideas

A Life Full of Energy

Hello T.

So you'd like to "live a life filled with energy". What a lovely phrase!

The first thing I would say is to flesh that out with really specific, concrete goals.

What would a life full of energy look like?
Where would that life be based? (Where would you live?)

Who would be around you? If you can't give names, give attributes - ages, genders, income brackets, personal characteristics, etc.
How would you earn your living?
How much would you earn?
How would you spend it?

Some of these things will be of no concern to you - other important things will be missing from this list - so this has to come from you. Sometimes it's easier if you look at the things you DON'T like and flip them upside down.

>> More

Dissolving Anger

Hello Jacqueline,

Anger is driven by two things:

a mis-match between what is and what ought to be
a sense of powerlessness to change it.

Removing the anger can involve:

changing a perception about how things are
changing a belief about how things ought to be
increasing control
finding new coping tactics

>> More

Your feedback, as always, is encouraged and welcomed. Just hit reply - I'm listening.

Best Wishes,

Chris

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