Writing these sequences
is a lot of (unpaid) work for me, and so - using one of my own favourite
techniques (called "Ready, Fire, Aim") - I offered all
the focus areas at once, but I didn't write any of them until I
knew what you wanted.
The most popular area was Finding your Life's
Purpose, so I wrote that one. Knowing that commitment is essential
to progress, and that we learn more by doing, I included some very
short exercises which used the concepts in the modules; completing
each exercise would grant you access to the next module. And six
modules in - ONE PERSON LEFT!
If you're one of the people who signed up for this
focus area, by all means let me know what happened from your perspective
by replying to this email.
But I think I already know. I've learned over the
years that - left alone - we tend to lose focus, commitment, and
motivation. Initial enthusiasm turns to pessimism and we lose belief.
Without belief, there is no reason to invest EFFORT and so we don't.
That's one way regular coaching helps - the weekly calls provide
a framework of accountability and motivation and the financial investment
you make commits you to do your best.
Here's the bottom line. It's not just the bottom
line for you and me, or for you and coaching. It's the bottom line
for you and your life. It's my most-used phrase, but it is at the
core of all personal change.
If you keep doing what
you've always done
You'll keep getting what you've always got
Reading a book won't change anything. Learning
what you should do won't change anything. Asking for - and receiving
- advice won't change anything. Having an AH HAH! moment won't change
anything. Making a resolution or keeping a diary won't change anything.
Hiring a life coach won't change anything. All these things are
only useful as stepping stones to DOING DIFFERENT THINGS. You have
to make the moves.
Of course, many of us don't know what to do, don't
know what we want (but not THIS!), don't have any spare time or
energy, and we find comfort in the familiar and fear in the unknown,
and so on. And so the items above - and others - are all useful
in finding some key answers - but it will always coming down to
doing new stuff.
Here's another way to look at it.
Consider the change you most want to make. Imagine
what it would be like to have that change in your life today. Roll
around in it a bit. Now ask yourself this question: What would
I be prepared to do or give or change to have this thing in my life?
For example, Would you resign from work? Would
you divorce? Relocate to the next town - or across the world? Would
you stop wearing that perfume? Would you give up 2 hours a night?
Would you pay £10 for a book? £100 for a course? Would
you give up Saturday football, or your evening class? What is the
biggest personal price you would pay to have this thing?
This does two really useful things.
Firstly, it helps you to calibrate your dream in
the real world. To hold it against tangible things in life and compare
it against them. You show your dream to a different part of your
Secondly it hints at the truth that there is no
such thing as a free lunch. There will be a price to pay, and almost
certainly - it will not be one you'd LOVE to pay; you'll have to
let go of something that you don't want to let go of. It might be
tangible (for example, cash) or familiarity (your career) or security
of some kind (facing a fear).
Personal change isn't really for the feint- or
half- hearted. But the weird thing is that deep down - none of us
are those things. We're strong, courageous and adventurous - but
it's usually buried.
That's where I come in.
but you have to start -
to be great!
that's right here